TT, this is maybe something for you in thought of your future career as a DJ

Lausche den Platten von DJ Thai Boy und hol sie dir frisch vom
Plattenteller; auch wenn sie dir nicht gefallen. Die Schallplatten werden unter stetiger Erhöhung der Lautstärke so lange gespielt, bis sie jemand nach Hause nimmt.

Zu oberst im Plattenkoffer:
AC/DC - Highway to Hell
Bros - die Hit-Single
Rolling Stones - Exile on Mainstreet
Milli Vanilli feat. Frank Farian
Motörhead - Etwas mit Kill und etwas mit Hell
Bob Marley - Catch a Fire
Ike und Tina Turner - just married
Che und Ray - Die Boogie-Woogie-Granaten

Alles muss weg! Und alles gratis!
Bei mehr als einem Interessenten, werden die Platten versteigert (Erstgebot:ein Stutz).
Die Platte spielt mindestens ein ganzes Stück.
Es ist genug für alle da.

MONDAY, 26th OF APRIL. 22h.

Yesterday i wanted to get some food at the local store. When i got there the store (ICA) , the drainage system had been blocked and some plumbers tried to fix it. As they couldn't get rid of the blockage the usual way, they got out the high pressure pumps to try to flush out whatever was causing the bottleneck.

One thing they completely missed was that as they blew high pressure water into the system, the sewage water found a new way of escaping: out of the drainage holes in the floor of the shop. All of a sudden piss and shit was squiring everywhere, out of every hole and corner of the grocery shop. Soon the shop was covered in a nice layer of foul smelling human secretion.

Enter bastard; who swiftly walks in, wonders where the foul smell comes from and with his academic mind quickly makes the genius conclusion that it comes from the baby a few meters away from him. He steps in a puddle of brown water and is annoyed that once again the "ready food" freezer has broken down. He goes over to the meat dish and elegantly with his cool way picks up a nice piece of meat and makes his way to the counter striding quite happily trotting and splattering about in this murky water...

I think it was somewhere halfway down the aisle that I realized. It must have been the lady in front of me and her continuous attempt to throw up that made me aware of situation. In horror I looked around and saw the little fountain of shit behind the delicatessen counter. All customers in the store had now rushed to pay for their goods and i found myself in a 20 m long queue. Horror. Standing there in piss and shit with my little 250g of "lövbiff" (beef) and a chocolate bar I started getting convulsions myself. To ease the thick air in the store the employees opened the doors at the exit. This however drew all the bad air to it and the stench became oven more unbearable.

Well to end this little grotesque story: The chocolate tasted of shit. The meat was horrendous and i have severe gas.

*roughly spellchecked by br0aky at 22/04/04@00:20 baila
*very rougly you're right...
*what the hell you doin fugly boys cock arse wank bitch