Ich will nie ins Altersheim!

Wenn ich einmal in später Zukunft alt und klapprig bin, werde ich bestimmt nicht ins Altersheim gehen, sondern auf ein Kreuzfahrtschiff.

Die Gründe dafür hat mir unser Gesundheitsminister Pascal Couchepin
geliefert:

"Die durchschnittlichen Kosten für ein Altersheim betragen 400 Franken pro Tag"!!!

Ich habe eine Reservierung für das Kreuzfahrtschiff "Aida" geprüft und muss für eine Langzeitreise als Rentner 270 Franken pro Tag zahlen. Nach Adam Riese bleiben mir dann noch 130 Franken pro Tag übrig. Die kann ich verwenden für:

(see comments)

From the State where drink driving is considered a sport, comes a true story from the Sunshine Coast, Queensland.
Recently a routine police patrol parked outside a local neighbourhood tavern. Late in the evening the officer noticed a man leaving the bar so intoxicated that he could barely walk. The man stumbled around the car park for a few minutes, with the officer quietly observing. After what seemed an eternity and trying his keys on five vehicles, the man managed to find his car which he fell into.He was there for a few minutes as a number of other patrons left the bar and drove off.

Finally he started the car,switched the wipers on and off (it was a fine dry night), flicked the indicators on, then off, tooted the horn and then switched on the lights.

He moved the vehicle forward a few cm, reversed a little and then remained stationary for a few more minutes as some more vehicles left.

At last he pulled out of the car park and started to drive slowly down the road.

The police officer, having patiently waited all this time, now started up the patrol car, put on the flashing lights, promptly pulled the man over and carried out a breathalyser test. To his amazement the breathalyser indicated no evidence of the man having consumed alcohol at all!

Dumbfounded, the officer said "I'll have to ask you to accompany me to > the > Police station this breath-alyser equipment must be broken."

"I doubt it," said the man, "tonight I'm the designated decoy".

True story...

From b3ta...