Here is Abba, with a special appearance by Sonja from Eastenders...

Can't believe i found it after all these years.. basically it's a Not the Nine o Clock News parody of Kate Bush.

If you don't know Kate Bush or Not the Nine o Clock News it won't be too funny... but this is for Broaky, coz i keep singing it and he thinks i'm mad.

OH ENGLAND MY LEOTARD

I was into yin and yang and hatha yoga
Ginseng and caraway seeds and being a non-smoker
My cauliflower quiches were better than the bought ones
And I was thicker than two short ones
People bought my latest hits
Coz they like my latex tits
Everyone trying hard
To get inside my leotard

Went to my hairdresser to have a hair-do (hair do-be-do-be-do)
He asked if I knew A La Recherche De Temps Perdus
That's how I was introduced to Colette, Cocteau and Marcel Proust
Now wholefood cookery is just a sideline

(Shrill 'La-La-la' middle eight.)

I went to Cairo and I read the Gnostic
Apocryphon of John in the original Coptic
Korsakoff's psychosis theories
And the Fibonacci series
Studied acupuncture and the Bible (Buyabubble!)
Opened the windows in my mind

'It's not your mind, it's your body they're into-oo-oo'
My business-manager said.
He said that I need an intellect like I need a
Hole in the hole in the hole in the head!

Though I'm an honorary member of Mensa now
I'm going to try and keep up the pretence somehow!
Coz you buy my latest hits
Because you like my latex tits
And you're all trying hard to get inside my
Leotard leotard leotard

Oh England, my leotard...